I wish I could to go back to my last interaction with my mom before her aneurysm. I wish I could go back 15 years right before I probably said very hurtful words to someone I shouldn’t have. I want a do-over. I wish I could go back to 2011 when I took some time off from full-time ministry and took time to travel and play. I wish I could do-over the past 10 months. I wish I could do-over the past 2 months. I wish I could go back to this morning for a do-over and take back stupid and lame things that came out of my mouth. I want a do-over.
The problem is… not only can I not get a do-over… but even if I were to go back, I only wish to go back with the knowledge and experiences I have now… which is just not possible. It’s impossible to live without any regrets in life… I sure try my best though. Life is full of mistakes… regrets… and pain. There are things I wish I could do-over just about every day. I ask myself “did I represent Jesus well today?” and unfortunately, I can always think of a way I didn’t. Trust me, I’m not the type of person who beats myself over my shortcomings every day… but everyday, I’m reminded how far from perfect and good I am. I’m also reminded how far from perfect this life is… it’s full of frustrations, pain and tears.
Thankfully, God doesn’t hold my imperfection against me. Although I keep making mistakes, He’s already forgiven me of stupid things I’ll do in the days, weeks, months, and years to come… and He calls me His. And while I can’t go back to yesterdays for a do-over, He gives me a do-over every new day. I have the opportunity to make wrongs right. I have the opportunity to make wiser decisions, having learned from past mistakes. I have the opportunity to represent Jesus better tomorrow than I did today. It doesn’t mean I’ll get it perfect one day… not as long as I live on earth. But I get a do-over every day when I open my eyes.
Life is still full of frustrations, pain, and tears… thankfully, God knows them all… He knows my frustrations. He knows my pain. He knows my tears. And while not everything is under my control, I get a do-over each day to change my attitude, perspective, and response. I already have a do-over!